How To Get The Girl
by PinkCatsy
Summary: Inuyasha and Miroku compete against each other to see who can get their crushes first. InuKag InuKik MirSan
1. Chapter 1: The Bet

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Inuyasha, simply put, I just don't. Don't force me to say this every single time, it's like a little knife into my heart...

**Note:** Whatever tips you see written here, I just made up. I _am_ a girl but yeah don't completely trust this stuff, okay? I don't want to be held responsible for any broken, disappointed hearts.

**How to Get the Girl**

"So guys what do you think I should do?" Nobunaga pleaded, "I really like Tetsuya but she doesn't seem to notice me at all."

"Easy," Inuyasha and Miroku replied.

Nobunaga lit up. "Really? What should I do?"

Miroku smiled, "Come back tomorrow, there's just too much to tell you all right now."

Nobunaga glanced at Inuyasha who merely gave him a look and then turned away. Nobunaga sighed and walked away.

...tomorrow...

"So what do I do?" Nobunaga jumped up and down excitedly.

Miroku beamed as only one who believed to be a total expert in the field of women could. "Just follow the steps in this book and Tetsuya will beg to be with you." He tossed him a purple notebook.

Nobunaga glanced at Inuyasha.

"If you really want it," Inuyasha huffed and pulled out a red notebook.

Miroku glanced curiously at Inuyasha. "You wrote one too?"

"Got nothing better to do," Inuyasha remarked.

Nobunaga was flipping through both notebooks when he found something alarming. "They're both so different!" He gasped, "Who's advice do I follow?"

Miroku sighed, "Mine obviously, does Inuyasha look like someone who understands the female mind?"

Nobunaga looked up at the gruffly dressed, messy and slightly dirty guy who was known as the school bad boy. He wasn't often approached by anyone other than his friends because he scared most of the school shitless. He glared and scowled often and was found sulking up in the treetops on a daily basis. As far as anyone knew he had never even had a girlfriend, most figured none of the girls interested him at all.

"You're right..." Nobunaga replied and nearly pooped himself at the glare Inuyasha shot him.

Inuyasha scowled, "Oh and Miroku's track record is so perfect. When was the last time a girl actually responded positively to any of your lecherous crap?"

"I don't ever remember any instance of that kind," Nobunaga answered.

"At least I have a track record," Miroku huffed.

Nobunaga looked between the two of them for a moment. Then he got an idea. "Why don't you guys prove to me your advice works? Both of you use your own advice to try and get a girl. Whoever gets their girl first wins and I follow their advice, okay?"

Inuyasha and Miroku traded looks.

Nobunaga bit his lip. "Wait, do both of you have any girl in particular you'd actually could test your advice on?"

Miroku smirked as the image of the luscious Sango came to mind. Inuyasha, on the other hand, merely blushed and looked away.

Nobunaga took their reactions as a 'yes'. "This is great!"

"W-wait, I haven't agreed to anything yet!" Inuyasha cried.

Miroku smirked, "You afraid that I'll win, Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha whipped towards Miroku. "Hell no! It's just-"

"Just what?" Miroku rose both eyebrows.

Inuyasha turned away. "Never mind."

"So you guys will do it?" Nobunaga asked.

Miroku smirked, "Absolutely." Inuyasha just nodded very vaguely.

"My dear friend, although this may be a friendly competition, don't think that I won't, pardon my language, kick your ass in this," Miroku smiled as he held his arm.

Inuyasha latched onto it and shook it. "You're gonna lose worse than Elmo in a wrestling match, okay? Especially if you think that you can snag Sango with your idiotic pick-up lines."

"I presume that it's the fair Lady Kikyo, you're after?" Miroku retorted.

Inuyasha went deep red. "K-keh, you can presume whatever the hell you want," Inuyasha crossed his arms over his chest, "I-it ain't any of my business."

Nobunaga beamed, "This might just end well for all of us! Well I got to go home now, see you!"

"Wait, Nobunaga watch-" Inuyasha sighed as Nobunaga walked headfirst into a tree, "-out for that tree."

Nobunaga got up and smiled, he merely brushed off the dust and went on his way.

"Clumsy, isn't he?" Miroku remarked.

"More like a fool," Inuyasha answered then called, "Wait, Nobunaga, DON'T, THERE'S A-" Inuyasha slapped his forehead as Nobunaga walked into another tree, "tree over there."

Miroku laughed, "Definitely a fool."

...

Inuyasha lay in his room, his bangs covering his eyes. "I can't believe I agreed to this." Inuyasha felt so stupid. "This is never gonna work." He bit his lip. "I'm so gonna make a fool of myself...in front of _her_."

"_I presume that it's the fair Lady Kikyo, you're after?"_

Inuyasha scowled, "How on earth did that lech ever figure out...?" Inuyasha had tried to be very discreet in his 'observations' of Kikyo. He watched her using the reflection of her image on the window. He usually sat alone though. He had never even talked to her once. And whenever she walked by, he managed to compose himself enough to 'ignore' her presence. No one else in the school knew, how could Miroku have...unless... Inuyasha hurried jumped off his bed and slid his hand around the floor under his bed. Nothing.

"That asshole has my di- journal!" Inuyasha cried. He only wrote in it every other day, so if it was gone for two days he wouldn't notice. Miroku must have taken it yesterday when Inuyasha had left him and Sango in his room to get them cookies. That means Sango probably knows too...and if she told Kagome...and Kagome told her friends... Inuyasha found himself hyperventilating. _Calm down Yash, Sango wouldn't blab something like that and Miroku...couldn't have told anyone else...he wouldn't...still..._ Inuyasha ripped out his cell.

...at Miroku's house...

"And by Friday, she'll be mine!" Miroku had just finished setting up his plan for the week when his cell phone rang.

"Hello," Miroku answered.

"Don't hello me, you stupid asshole," Inuyasha snapped, "Don't you know not to take people's stuff, especially their _private_ stuff!"

Miroku smiled, "You noticed it was gone? But don't you write tomorrow?"

"Shut up, okay?" Inuyasha replied, "Give it back right now or else I'll cut you up into little pieces."

Miroku chuckled, "Fine, fine. I just have one question-"

"My guidance counsellor recommended it," Inuyasha replied curtly.

"Okay...I'll be right over with your diary," Miroku remarked and hung up before Inuyasha could respond. _His guidance counsellor recommended it?_ It was probably true, that guy had a weekly appointment with her because of his 'many issues'. She could have recommended it as a way to sort out and manage his 'feelings in positive and productive manner'. Miroku chuckled, "Inuyasha's got a diary..."

* * *

How do y'all feel about it so far? To be honest, this one was supposed to wait until after I finished Bundle of Joy and Falling Star....but I'm getting seriously bored. If you review fast you'll get the next two chapters in no time!


	2. Chapter 2: Step 1 Presentation

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Inuyasha, simply put, I just don't. Don't force me to say this every single time, it's like a little knife into my heart...

**Note:** Whatever tips you see written here, I just made up. I _am_ a girl but yeah don't completely trust this stuff, okay? I don't want to be held responsible for any broken, disappointed hearts.

**How to Get the Girl**

**Inuyasha's Step 1: Presentation**

Inuyasha was thankful that his diary was back in the right hands. Now that his diary dilemma was dealt with he could focus on this stupid challenge. Nobunaga had dropped by to return their notebooks just in case they forgot any of their own advice.

Inuyasha flipped to the first page.

_(1)PRESENTATION: Like it or not, every girls looks at you before they see you. So if the girl of your dreams isn't paying any attention to you maybe you ought to 'package' yourself differently. But keep in mind, don't dress yourself up in a way __**she'd**__ like, change up your style to something __**you'd**__ like. If you're not being yourself then it's just not worth it._

Inuyasha sighed, it did make a lot of sense it probably was why Kikyo never seem to look his way. He walked over to his full length, constantly abused mirror. As he headed towards it, he swore it creaked in fear. He rolled his eyes. "I'm not gonna punch you today."

Inuyasha stared at himself and for once noticed that his bangs were getting a little long. They were always in face and covered his eyes. They helped mask his expression but now it was getting ridiculous. "I need a trim..." He sighed. Then he looked at his clothes. He looked like he just came from a funeral. Every single day of high school he wore dark colours, he had discarded his uniform long ago after he had accidently shredded it in a fit of pure rage. He looked somewhat scary and emo all the time. "I need to shop..." he groaned.

Inuyasha went to his bathroom and began work on his bangs. "This better work..." he felt kind of like he was mutilating his hair.

**Miroku's Step 1:** **Presentation**

Miroku opened up the purple notebook.

_(1)PRESENTATION: You've got to have the best wrapping to be the best gift. Silk, leather and anything in between. Don't forget sunglasses, the symbol of cool._

Miroku looked through his closet. _What will catch Sango's eye?_ He searched for his sexiest set of clothes for what felt like hours. He sighed, "Time for a new wardrobe..."

...

Miroku ran into his favourite store at the very back of the mall. "Yo, Purple Pimp, I need your help."

"What is the password, boy?" a voice called from behind the wooden door at the back.

Miroku took a deep breath. "Sir Gangsta Pimp of Pure Purple-osity, I, your humble servant of servitude, humbly request your assistance in a wardrobe malfunction of godly proportion."

"What is your major malfunction?" the man replied.

"I ain't got nothing as good as you."

"Repeat."

"I AIN'T GOT NOTHING AS GOOD AS YOU!"

"You may enter my sanctuary fool but touch my hoes and your my bitch, understand?" a man in a ridiculous purple suit beckoned Miroku in, "So keep all hands inside the car at all times, otherwise you best have life insurance."

Miroku nodded.

"Now what can I do you for?" the man smiled.

Miroku sighed, "I have me a lady problem."

"I have you a solution."

...Back with Inuyasha...

Inuyasha walked into his usual store. It was called the Bloody Dagger (I believe I made this up) and it specialized in clothes the colour of death and hate. Inuyasha's two favourite colours.

"Haven't seen you in days," a tall woman with multiple piercings remarked from behind the counter. She wore dark make-up and had tattoos all up her arms, mid-drift and legs. So all her clothes revealed her arms, mid-drift and legs.

"Shut up," Inuyasha replied, "You're lucky I'm here at all Hinata."

" 'Sup," Bankotsu appeared from the back of the store.

Inuyasha nodded, " 'Sup."

There was a moment of silence when...

"OMG!" Bankotsu and Hinata gasped, "I can actually SEE YOUR EYES!"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes and sighed, "I cut my bangs a little, get over it..."

"You have hazel eyes?" Hinata gasped, "I can't believe it, they're such a pretty gold colour."

Inuyasha's left eye twitched, "What colour did you think they were?"

"The colour of emo-ness," Bankotsu answered and earned himself a glare.

Hinata shrugged, "I figured they were red or pitch black."

Inuyasha groaned and shook his head. "I'm just going to buy my clothes and go, okay?"

"Wait a minute, Yash, did you brush your hair?" Hinata gasped.

"Gonna buy my clothes and go," Inuyasha repeated.

Bankotsu peered at him curiously, "You think new clothes would grab Kikyo's attention?"

Inuyasha whipped around to Bankotsu, who was clad in a navy blue t-shirt that read 'Hate Me, I deserve it, I kicked your mom's ass last week' and black jeans. "How'd you-"

"I got to your diary way before Miroku did," Bankotsu replied, "And I heard about the bet from Miroku. Honestly, you have my vote of confidence, you're gonna crush the lech's ass."

Hinata leaned forward, "But I thought Sango already liked him?"

"She does," they both replied, "It's just that idiot's gonna try and use cheesy pick-up lines and perverted cracks to get her attention."

"Besides," Bankotsu added, "once she hears that it was all just for a contest he's dead meat. Inuyasha's fine of course, because this will be an 'outlet to obtain his love'."

Inuyasha sneered at Bankotsu. "Oh yeah, does Kagome know about this?"

Bankotsu and Hinata traded a surprised look.

"Um excuse me, can I get some service here?" A teenage boy piped up.

Inuyasha blushed and looked away. "It's not like I like Kagome or anything...it's just well...let me act it out what will happen at tutoring today if she does know:

Me- Kagome what part did you not understand?

Kagome- HAHAHAHAHAHA you like Kikyo HAHAHAHAHA

Me- Ha...yeah but seriously, which part of class did you not get?

Kagome- HAHAHAHAHA and _you_ think you can get her? As if! HAHAHAHAHAHA

Me- I get it, you find it hilarious...now back to the whole tutoring-

Kagome- AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Me- getting irritated...

SLAM!

Me- At least it got her to shut up.

See, did that sound pleasant?" Inuyasha concluded.

The two (three counting the ignored customer) stared at Inuyasha horrified.

"You wouldn't hit a girl would you?" Hinata asked.

"Not with my hands," Inuyasha answered, "But I would have a text book..."

"YOU HORRIBLE MONSTER!" the ignored teen cried and ran out of the store.

"Who was that?" Inuyasha asked.

Bankotsu and Hinata shrugged.

"Oh, Yash, don't worry Kagome doesn't have a clue," Bankotsu replied, "Her phone was busy when I tried to tell her."

"Wow Bankotsu," Inuyasha remarked, "I can trust you with everything, can't I?"

Bankotsu merely scoffed, "I thought you were just gonna buy something and go..."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

"Wait a minute, you tutor?" Hinata asked.

Inuyasha sighed, "Just gonna buy something and go..."

...back with Miroku...

"Thank you Purple Pimp," Miroku replied as he left the store.

"Let the funk be with you!" he cried, "LET THE FUNK BE WITH YOU!"

**Reactions (Inuyasha):**

Kagome sat in her room looking through her textbook. "Inuyasha is late _again_."

Suddenly her door swung open and in came the hanyou.

"Speak of the devil," Kagome replied.

Inuyasha scoffed, "Shut up."

As Inuyasha sat in front of her, Kagome began noticing things about him she had never noticed before. First off, he had really nice eyes. _Since when did Inuyasha get such beautiful eyes?_ Plus he had a really nice build, he had a black Death Note t-shirt on with black camo and wooden bead necklace. Oh and his hair was so nice. _Wow...how could I not notice all this stuff about the guy I have seen everyday since grade eight?_

"Kagome?" Inuyasha waved his hand in front of her, "Yo...Kagome?" She wasn't paying any attention. Inuyasha stared at the ceiling in silent prayer then looked back at Kagome and slapped her.

"Ow...what the hell was that for?" Kagome snapped.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "You weren't paying any attention. No matter what I did you stayed in your own little world."

"Shut up..." Kagome replied. _I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous. I do not think he's gorgeous._

"Kagome?" Inuyasha waved his arm in front of her face. _Here we go again..._

**Reaction (Miroku):**

Miroku swaggered up to Sango at the mall. He had a couple of minutes before the rest of them arrived and he was gonna use it to win fair Sango's heart.

"Hey Sango!" He smiled.

Sango turned to him very slowly, already scowling. "WTF do you want?"

"I was just wondering-"

"No."

"But-"

"No."

"Don't you-"

"Hell to the no."

"C'mon Sango, I just-"

"Want to make the rest of us look like total idiots? What the hell are you wearing anyways?" Sango glanced at his too-tight leather pants and shirt. "Gawd, I think I can see your balls suffocating..."

"My balls, eh?"

Sango kicked him in the balls. "You should thank me, I just put them out of their misery."

"Oww..." Miroku winced.

**Reactions (Inuyasha 2):**

Inuyasha felt little butterflies rise up in his stomach. Would Kikyo even notice him at all? Let alone notice that he's done something different? Inuyasha exhaled before walking past her locker where she was excitedly chatting with her friends.

"I know!" Kikyo cried just when a sudden gust of wind blew by. She turned to see Inuyasha. When she caught his gaze, her heart practically melted. _He has the most gorgeous golden eyes...how come I've never noticed them before? _And Kikyo, for the very first time, noticed how strong he looked. _Oh...my..god..._

"Kikyo? Kikyo!" Hinagiku shook her dazed friend.

"Unh?" Kikyo snapped right out of her Inuyasha based fantasy.

Momoko followed Kikyo's gaze, "What were you looking so hungrily at anyways?"

"Hungrily?" Kikyo gasped and looked back but Inuyasha was gone.

Hinagiku sighed, "Don't tell me you're going boy crazy too?"

"No, not boy crazy..." Kikyo answered still dazed. _Inuyasha crazy..._

* * *

Wondering whether it's InuKag or InuKik....it's _both_ hahaha! HAHA!

Ashes of the Phoenix

KyriaHitomi

airpeeps

bingbangboom714

smurfers21

inugurl94

claudia123

HoneH


	3. Chapter 3: Do I Want the Guy?

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Inuyasha, simply put, I just don't. Don't force me to say this every single time, it's like a little knife into my heart...

**Note:** Whatever tips you see written here, I just made up. I _am_ a girl but yeah don't completely trust this stuff, okay? I don't want to be held responsible for any broken, disappointed hearts.

**How to Get the Girl**

Kagome sighed, exasperated. On her way to the mall to meet her friends yet all she could think of was Inuyasha. She couldn't believe herself, she was obsessing over this guy that she had known since grade eight. Just because he spontaneously became gorgeous. _Am I really that shallow? I mean, if I really am starting to crush on him…this is like two years too late!_ _Maybe I'm just NOT crushing on him! _Kagome felt herself sigh in relief, this made sense. _It's just gonna come to pass after I get over his insane hotness._

Kagome's eye twitched. _I just called it insane hotness?! OMG?! Am I becoming just like Ayumi?! Gah and just because damn Inuyasha just randomly decides 'I'm gonna make myself attractive!' _Kagome felt her face heat up. _However did he manage to make his 'ugh' self so…. 'ah'. I mean with someone so gorgeous in front of my all the time –how could I possibly handle myself? How would I ever manage to hide this ridiculous cr –infatuation- from him? FROM ANYONE! I mean, I was oogling him in class! HOW COULD I OGLE INUYASHA! THE SAME INUYASHA WHO HAS LIVED NEXT DOOR FOR TWO YEARS! THE VERY SAME ONE WHO HAD BEEN TUTORING ME FOR TWO YEARS! THE EXACT ONE WHO HAD BABYSAT MY BROTHER SINCE GRADE EIGHT! The very same who is about as antisocial as it gets…the very same with that cocky smirk and the gorgeous snort…and –O-M-G- he didn't do ANY OF THAT yesterday! _

At this point, she was hyperventilating. _I could be falling for Inuyasha… if I fall for Inuyasha… how would I CONFESS? How COULD I CONFESS? He'd laugh to death at ME! I mean… am I his type? DOES HE EVEN HAVE A TYPE? I have serious questions… how can I not know whether INUYASHA is interested in girls? He has to be but… why am I stressing out over this? I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with Inuyasha. I'm not in love with-_ "Oof!" Kagome in her panic had bumped right into Kikyo, the girl who had lived two doors down from her since eigth grade. "Uh…hi, Kikyo…" Kagome greeted but Kikyo didn't seem to notice, she seemed to be stuck in her own thoughts.

Kikyo couldn't believe herself. She has been, and still is, thinking about Inuyasha. He had some how manage to consume her thoughts completely and even left her dazed and unfocused in class. She bit her lip. _He's just so hot…_ Kikyo felt guilt slowly rise in her body. _I wonder if he has a six-pack…_ Kikyo drooled.

Kikyo's eyes opened wide. _Immoral thoughts… I… am… having… immoral… thoughts…_ Kikyo bit her lip. _About the same little boy who has lived next to me as long as I can remember._ Memories of little Inuyasha, playing and smiling with his mother bubbled up. Kikyo remembered watching him for her window and smiling up at him whenever he caught her glance. She also remember the matching blushes that would soon follow. _I wonder what he'd look like blushing now…_ Kikyo's mind ventured kinkily. _DIRTY… DIRTY THOUGHTS…_ Kikyo came from a long line of mikos, if her mind was tainted like this, she would most likely find her powers inaccessible. _Must remain clean… must remain clean and virginal…_ But the moment the word popped up in her mind, she quickly regretted. _I wonder if Inuyasha's a virgin… does he even like women…?? OMG… WHAT IF HE DOESN'T? I MEAN, I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM-?_

Kikyo stopped herself before her thoughts ventured to far into the yaoi region. _I've never seen him do any of that kind of stuff with a boy either… besides I'm _pretty sure _that he's hetero… yeah… straight… I wonder, if I'm his type? Could I be? _Kikyo frowned, she couldn't imagine her being his type at all. This sudden distress filled her heart at the realization. _WHAT IF HE DOESN'T LIKE ME? What if… what if… _The image of Inuyasha slapping her in disgust and looking down at her with a vicious smirk formed. _LUSTFUL THOUGHTS! LUSTFUL THOUGHTS! Could it be that my only intentions with cute little Inuyasha are immoral? Am I… am I __**that**__ kind of person? _

Kikyo's shoulder sagged under the weight of that thought. _What happen to the girl who used to merely watch and imagine just playing catch with him? Whatever happened to her?_ Kikyo felt a blush decorate her cheeks as her innocent feelings quickly returned. _I'm sure that this is just my crush returning… I mean… all teenagers have these kind of thoughts sometimes… and it's not like I have them willy nilly. Maybe it's just a symptom of falling in love… falling in love?! I'm… _"I could be falling in love with Inuyasha…" The words tasted sweet on her tongue, "I might just l- OW!"

Sango looked out her window just in time to see Kikyo ram into the tree in her front yard. Sango winced. "That's got to hurt." Sango chuckled as Kikyo walked away, rubbing her forehead and looking a little lost. "I haven't seen something that funny since…"

Thoughts of Miroku falling out of a window resurfaced. He was confessing to the transfer student and caught up in the 'love' of the moment accidentally backed right into the open window and fell right out. Luckily enough, they were only on the first floor but, needless to say, he was still rejected.

Sango laughed, "He's such an idiot." A light blush formed on her cheeks.

Sango noticed and her hands rushed to her face. _W- what's wrong with me?! _She also remembered asking herself this when she felt so angry at Miroku for confessing to the transfer student. She didn't know why she was so angry at the time but she was beginning to see it now. _Maybe… just maybe… that idiot, baka pervert may have captured my attention._

She snorted at herself as she remember what he had worn to the movies. _Sango, don't tell me you think you're serious about that IDIOTIC, WOMANIZING PERVERT?_ Sango slapped [yes, slapped] herself out of it and laughed, "If I _did_ like him, I wouldn't have rejected him right? Right?"

Her answer was silence, mostly because she was the only one in the room but still.

"But I _might've_ said yes had he not looked so ridiculous at the time," Sango answered delicately, "It's really hard to know whether he's serious about me or not when he does stuff like that…"

"Onee-chan!" Kohaku called.

"Yes!" Sango screamed, a little peeved at her brother for interrupting her.

"Phone!"

"Who is it?"

"Miroku!"

"Hang up," Sango answered, directing her rage at Miroku instead of herself. _It's the damn pervert's fault for making me even CONSIDER going out with him…_

"Okay…" Kohaku seemed wary but obeyed his sister and regretfully hung up.

"I do not want Miroku…" Sango assured herself, "At least not today."

* * *

KAY MAJORLY IMPORTANT QUESTION HERE... can y'all give me a 'tip' to be featured in the next chapter? Thankies.

It has to be a general thanks since my laptop had to freaking reboot...


	4. Chapter 4: Checkpoint

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Inuyasha, simply put, I just don't. Don't force me to say this every single time, it's like a little knife into my heart...

**Note:** Whatever tips you see written here, I just made up. I _am_ a girl but yeah don't completely trust this stuff, okay? I don't want to be held responsible for any broken, disappointed hearts.

**How to Get the Girl**

When Miroku arrived at school the next day, he tried very hard to hide how discouraged he felt right now. He knew he was the expert when it came to all things _female_. He knew it in his bones.

It's just that part wasn't coming out yet. It was a slow process, okay?

But Inuyasha wouldn't get that. And Miroku, though usually not _too_ competitive, could not stand the idea of the smug look on Inuyasha's face if he ever thought he was winning.

No offence to Inuyasha, but this was _Inuyasha_. He was a girl repellent if Miroku ever saw one.

So, to spare himself some pride, Miroku smiled confidentally when he met Inuyasha at the schoolyard. Inuyasha, up until that moment, had appeared to be his usually sulky self.

But he seemed to break into a noticeable smirk when he saw Miroku. It grated Miroku's nerves, _just a little bit_. Again, no offence to Inuyasha, but it was quite an ego bruiser to feel like _Inuyasha_ was doing better at snagging girls than _Miroku_ was.

Inuyasha bit his lip as he walked to school. He really didn't understand why his changes didn't seem to have any affect on Kikyo yet. In fact, it seemed like she was _avoiding_ him now. She was refusing to make eye contact.

Inuyasha felt his heart sink at the memory. Maybe it had been a _good_ thing to have had his eyes hidden under his bangs. He personally didn't think he looked that bad, admittedly, but his eyes were invariably different from the eyes of a girl.

However, no matter how discouraged he felt, he couldn't let Miroku know. He could _never_ let Miroku know. After all, Inuyasha had pride to maintain. And despite Miroku's constant claims of being the _ultimate_ ladies' man, Miroku was very, _very_ far from it. And what a blow to the ego it would be, if Inuyasha lost to _the_ unofficial _enemy of women_.

Especially since Miroku was aiming for Sango, the woman who had _declared_ Miroku an enemy of women.

So, Inuyasha would have to put up a little facade. Just a confident smirk, that was all it took and as long as Miroku didn't actually _ask_ how things were going. Miroku would never _find out_ how things were actually going.

Inuyasha looked up just as Miroku arrived with an irritatingly smug expression. Inuyasha doubted that Miroku had managed to woo Sango in the slightest but Miroku's expression said otherwise. So Inuyasha forced his best smirk.

_Ooze confidence, Inuyasha._ He thought to himself. _Ooze it._

"Oh hey! Inuyasha! Miroku!"

Both Inuyasha and Miroku were startled at the sound of Nobunaga's voice. They turned just in time to see him walk into a tree. And then another tree.

And then another.

Inuyasha didn't even bother to warn him anymore.

Eventually Nobunaga made his way with an excited grin on his face. "So how are you guys doing?"

There was an awkward laugh from both of them. "_Well..._"

Nobunaga blinked, "Not doing so well?"

"OF COURSE NOT!" they blurted simultaneously.

Miroku cleared his throat, casting a quick glance at Inuyasha from the corner of his eye. "It's just... this whole process takes a lot longer than one would think. Even if _I'm _the man doing it."

Inuyasha nodded, "Yes. You can't expect instantaneous results after all. It takes time to win over a girl's heart."

Nobunaga's eyes darted between them. "If you say so!" he chirped, "Well, see you guys around! I'm going to try and see if I can run into Tetsuya this morning!"

As soon as Nobunaga was out of the way, after hitting quite a few more trees, Miroku turned to Inuyasha with a raised eyebrow.

Inuyasha narrowed his eyes. "What are you looking at?" he snapped.

Miroku opened his mouth to explain before quickly changing his mind. He averted his gaze, sighing, "Never mind."

It was just then that the girls arrived on the scene. Sango and Kagome seemed to be deep in conversation as they headed towards them. Sango sent a glare over in Miroku's direction before raising her voice.

"WASN'T HIS OUTFIT COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS, KAGOME?"

Kagome gave Sango a look before realizing what it was Sango was trying to do. She nodded, bellowing, "YEAH. REALLY EMBARRASSING."

"AND, THE IDIOT PERVERT TRIED TO _HIT_ ON ME IN THAT OUTFIT! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?" Sango continued, giving Miroku the evil eye.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes; they were overdoing it a bit. But inwardly he smirked. So Miroku was doing just as well as he thought. In other words, terrible.

Miroku shrank under Sango's glare. Was what he had done _so_ wrong? The Purple Pimp had picked out Miroku's duds _personally_. Miroku still didn't understand how everything had gone so tragically wrong. Or why Sango was still hung up on it.

"I WAS DEEPLY DISGUSTED!" Sango explained before stopping just short of the guys and clearing her throat, "Hello Inuyasha." She turned to Miroku. "Miroku," she replied curtly.

Inuyasha nodded at Sango in response while Miroku looked at her pleading, "Oh forgive me! Fair Sango!"

"Stuff a sock in it!" Sango snapped, turning away.

However, at this point, Inuyasha tuned out of the usual Miroku-Sango antics. He was far too perpelexed by Kagome.

She was avoiding looking him in the eye _too_. In fact, Kagome had turned her whole face away from him.

Inuyasha's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. What was so _bad_ about him now that girls were refusing to acknowledge his prescence? Well, with the exception of Sango, but Sango was different from most of the girls at the school, so she hardly counted.

Inuyasha averted his gaze as well, deciding to better spend his attention on an idle tree. Rather than think about the damage this stupid bet was doing to his self-esteem.

* * *

Aww, poor dense Inuyasha. Oh, and Miroku too.

Sorry for taking EONS to update this story. To be absolutely honest, I forgot about it.

Thanks for sticking around?

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alice's sister

xXMiaInoriXx


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